ugh, the last one is twisted. living an #Instagramlife is hard, y’all.
Even after my less-than-stellar experience with Khloe’s kollab (barf) with Kylie’s Cosmetics, I decided I had to try Kim’s new KKW collection (man, in such a politically and ethically turbulent year, all of the K’s really seem to be in poor taste). Kim might not be everyone’s cup (kup? I KAN’T STOP!) of tea, but I think we can mostly agree that her make-up as of late is FLAWLESS. Continue reading
missed part one, part two, part three or part four?
So, Rob Kardashian has dipped out on the family and for once, this doesn’t seem to be manufactured drama for Keeping up with the Kardashians. He basically deleted his social media accounts, which were a big part of his income (due to shilling all of the stuff that all reality people seem to: detox teas, teeth whiteners, protein powders, etc). Shockingly, Rob even stopped appearing on the show. The family still mentioned him regularly, but usually just to comment on how sad his situation was. His anger at Kim seemed to be the only thing Rob put out in public periodically.
watch out, neil patrick harris. kim kardashian is coming for youuuuu. image source: people funny.com
missed part one, two or three?
So Kim filed for divorce after a scant 72 days and the public response was… harsh. Everyone from Jon Hamm to Reese Witherspoon threw shade at Kim and her family for the lack of “reality” in all of their ventures.
snl’s nasim pedrad as kim was fantastic. image source: azcentral.com
missed part one or part two? check ’em out!
So it’s 2004 and Paris Hilton is EVERYWHERE. After “someone else” leaked her sex tape with Rick Soloman (who was once married to Pamela Anderson, the queen of the celeb sex tape), Paris became famous for being famous. She and her BFF Nicole Richie starred in the reality show The Simple Life, and young girls everywhere started wanting ridiculously short skirts, super deep tans and for all of their brain cells to disappear.
god I love how tacky the early aughts were. image source: giphy.com
missed part one? check it out!
SO where were we? Ah yes, Kris has finally separated from Robert and the beginning of their nasty split has taken a toll on the family. Kris swears off men for approximately 0.02 seconds before her friend introduces her to Olympian Bruce Jenner. And the rest is history!
can you imagine if these were your parents? image source: giphy.com
all of this is my fault! and ray j’s! and prolly paris hilton’s. image source: giphy.com
YOU GUYS. I have to admit something… I am kind of cheating here. Kardashian Dynasty was not texted in emojis by Kylie. Or slurred in a bender mess from Lord Disick. In fact, this book wasn’t written by a Kardashian at all. For the first time in Coral and Slate history, I am reviewing a book about a reality star that isn’t actually by them (and by that, I mean that it wasn’t written by a ghost writer with the star’s name on it/permission).
I wonder how much twirling we are going to have to do. Sigh. image source: amazon.com
Kenya Moore. What can I say? I was so prepared to like her when she joined the cast of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, mostly just because she is so pretty and I am deeply shallow. HOWEVER, man she came in ready to PLAY and not in a good way. Considering she has feuded with basically everyone on the show (including my beloved Phaedra), she is a difficult one to root for.
I mean, I would trust this more than Kim Kardashian’s workout. image source: amazon.com
I’m going to be fully honest with y’all right now: Phaedra Parks is my favorite Real Housewife. OF ALL TIME. Seriously. I can’t get enough of her. She is the only one of my favorites who I haven’t gone lukewarm on thus far (former faves who have disappointed me include: Bethenny Frankel, Nene Leakes, Sonja Morgan, Lisa Rinna, Brandi Glanville and Tamara Judge).
look, it’s Kim’s old face! RIP.
YOU GUYS. Summer is almost here! And we all want to get those bikini bodies, or revenge bodies, or break-up bodies or whatever US Weekly is calling them this week. And one Miss Kimberly Kardashian-West is here to get us in our jeans by Friday.
BY FRIDAY.
Real Hockwives 