Month: May 2017

There is No F**king Secret: Part One

2 Comments

 

there is no f ing secret

not gonna lie, that hair is badass. image source: audible.com

Isn’t it crazy to think that The Osbournes premiered on MTV more than FIFTEEN years ago?  Y’all, we are old af.  It’s also straight loony tunes to realize that without Ozzy, Sharon, Jack & Kelly, there would probably be no reality television like we have today.  It’s so weird to imagine watching just scripted shows with like Juliana Margolis and no screaming pile of hair extensions and silicone crying because her dog’s cat’s cat mitzvah was a disaster. Continue reading →

KKW by Kylie Cosmetics: A Review

1 Comment

 

kkw kylie cosmetics

ugh, the last one is twisted. living an #Instagramlife is hard, y’all.

 

Even after my less-than-stellar experience with Khloe’s kollab (barf) with Kylie’s Cosmetics, I decided I had to try Kim’s new KKW collection (man, in such a politically and ethically turbulent year, all of the K’s really seem to be in poor taste).  Kim might not be everyone’s cup (kup? I KAN’T STOP!) of tea, but I think we can mostly agree that her make-up as of late is FLAWLESS. Continue reading →

The Secrets of My Life: Part Four

Leave a comment

missed part one, part two or part three? check em out!

cait 41.gif

match made in reality tv heaven. image source: rebloggy.com

So Bruce meets Kris and decides SHE is the one that can get his life back on track.  And by life, he means career.  Kris was the most socially gifted human Bruce had ever met and was in awe of her ability to work a room.  “Shocking!” – no one ever.  Anyway, Kris immediately takes over Bruce’s career and fires his old management team.  She gets him back into shape (minus da boobies, which stayed even after he ceased the female hormone therapy) and finds him several exercise equipment endorsement deals.  Honestly, I am just waiting for the other shoe to drop because so far, Caitlyn has said nothing bad at ALL about Kris.  So, either Kris completely (kompletely? no) overreacted to this book or, something is COMING, y’all.

Continue reading →

The Secrets of My Life: Part Three

4 Comments

missed part one or part two? check em out!

cait 31

not gonna lie, I love the lip color here. image source: tumblr.com

SO where were we? Ah yes, well Bruce finally mentions his sons he had with Linda Thompson, Brandon (who he calls one of his two best friends, the other being his son Burt) and Brody (who he calls a “successful DJ” #shade).  A lot of this book seems like an apology letter to his children, which is just really… sad.  Bruce had six kids with three different woman and besides Kendall and Kylie, wasn’t around hardly at all in their childhoods.  Maybe I am crazy, but I would prefer maybe some affirmation from my dad directly, not in a memoir.  But perhaps (perhaps!) my family dynamic is a little different than the Jenners. Continue reading →

The Secrets of My Life: Part Two

4 Comments

missed part one? check it out!

cait 11.gif

isn’t it literally in the title of this book that she does? image source: rebloggy.com

So Bruce wins the gold medal at the 1976 Olympics in the decathlon and stares at himself naked in the mirror wearing only the medal (um, okay).  He should feel like he has accomplished something SO huge, but his gender issues (as he describes them) continue to plague his self-confidence.   Even though he had essentially turned himself into the very personification of masculinity, Bruce knew he was still really running away from himself (YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE!?  RUNNING!)  Before his training, Bruce met his first wife, Chrystie (just imagine if she had spelled her name Khrystie.  Somewhere in America, a teen mom just got an idea for her baby name).  While Bruce worked on the ‘Lympics, Chrystie worked as a flight attendant (this is all so 70s, I love it) and was the bread winner. Continue reading →

The Secrets of My Life: Part One

3 Comments

 

cait 1

WHO BOY! image source: bittopper.com

OH Caitlyn with a C, never a K, Jenner, what to do with you?  When it finally came out that you were indeed transitioning to a female, I was in awe of you.  I mean, I do actually think it was super brave to do it in such a public fashion with all of the world watching.  I guess 2015 was a different time, as we didn’t quite realize how racist/sexist/homophobic the country still is until we got Trump (President Donald Trump!  Think about that again for a second.  It will never NOT be shocking) in the White House, but even so, I think it was so important for the trans community to have such a popular and public figure leading the charge.  There are so many misconceptions about marginalized groups and here was a KARDASHIAN-ADJACENT person AND a former Olympic gold-medalist who was a poster boy for American masculinity coming out and saying hey, I am actually a woman.  This was a BIG DEAL.

Continue reading →