* that’s what every dude in NYC said, right Bethenny?
ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh. image source: amazon.com
You guys, I bought Class with the Countess like six weeks ago and I just CANNOT. It is so effing wordy that I am actually scared of it. LOOK. Look at this chapter list!
I wonder how much twirling we are going to have to do. Sigh. image source: amazon.com
Kenya Moore. What can I say? I was so prepared to like her when she joined the cast of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, mostly just because she is so pretty and I am deeply shallow. HOWEVER, man she came in ready to PLAY and not in a good way. Considering she has feuded with basically everyone on the show (including my beloved Phaedra), she is a difficult one to root for.
I mean, I would trust this more than Kim Kardashian’s workout. image source: amazon.com
I’m going to be fully honest with y’all right now: Phaedra Parks is my favorite Real Housewife. OF ALL TIME. Seriously. I can’t get enough of her. She is the only one of my favorites who I haven’t gone lukewarm on thus far (former faves who have disappointed me include: Bethenny Frankel, Nene Leakes, Sonja Morgan, Lisa Rinna, Brandi Glanville and Tamara Judge).
we are so lucky to have a how-to book from this woman. image source: giphy.com
GUYS. Do you remember where you were on that fateful day? Of course you do. It was New Year’s Day, 2012, when the world was hit with the HUGE news story that Brandi Glanville had gotten married again.
missed part one? check it out here
especially while dating! #roseallday image source: buzzfeed.com
SO Brandi is now like totes over her divorce (did you know she got divorced? me either!) and is ready to put herself back out there! I am just so happy that we aren’t talking about Eddie and LeAnn (Leddie) anymore that I find her first story actually hilarious.
it’s not a walk of shame, it’s a victory lap.- Sonja morgan, RHONY. image source bravotv.com
Oh Brandi. Where do we even begin? Back when The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills wasn’t the most boring city in the Bravo stable (and yes, I am even including Dallas in that superlative- even if all of those women are THE WORST, that one black haired nut is a former carney, so we all win), Brandi was a breath of fresh air, with her supermodel looks and vicious mouth. Her close relationship with Lisa Vanderpump had a sort of Jill Zarin-Bethenny Frankel: West Coast vibe and I dug it. Even Lisa’s melting Rod Stewert doll husband Ken seemed to genuinely care about Brandi. Plus, she said WHATEVER she wanted and DID NOT GIVE ONE EFF. (Speaking of not giving a fuck, can we talk about everyone’s favorite new RHOBH Erika Jayne’s new music video? It is STRAIGHT BANANAS and I LUFF IT SO: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAdJzkUzV8k (maybe don’t watch it at work folks)
missed Part One or Part Two? check them out!
smoorgy smorgs! image source: makeagif.com
Like the good Italian that she is, Caroline included some recipes in a pdf that came with the audiobook. Now, I was actually excited to make one of Caroline’s recipes. The women of the Real Housewives of New Jersey may be nucking futs, but I assume they can cook their crazy asses off.
missed Part One? Check it out here
Where were we? Ah yes, about to jump into the wonderful world of parenting, Manzo style.
relax, christaphah, yoah like 30 yeaahs old. image source: giphy.com
So, honestly, the Manzo children do actually seem to have been raised well. Of all the real housewives, Caroline seems like she would be one of the best mothers. Her three kids all seem to be happy and being on tv doesn’t seem to have made them narcissistic blowhards, which so many kids from this franchise seem to end up becoming. Jacqueline’s daughter, Ashley, oh I’m sorry AshleE, was THE WORST. I could barely watch her scenes. And, of course, she had the most obvious reality show transformation.
about my FAMBILY! image source: newsobserver.com
After the straight nonsense that was both Turning the Tables AND Love Italian Style, I needed a little Caroline Manzo, queen of no bullshit in RHONJ fame, in my life. Caroline has always been the matriarch for the RHONJ, the grand dame who rules with an iron, ginger fist. She unfortunately left after season five (that sixth season! With those weird twins? I effing hated that mess) to be on her own show, the wonderfully (horribly? I can’t decide) titled Manzo’d with Children about her fambily.
there’s more?! L’horreur! image source: reddit.com
YOU GUYS. I thought I was done with ol’ CLu, but there are just MORE clothes from her, ahem, “Collection” that I have to talk about. Plus, this season on RHONY, a necklace Lulu re-gifted to everyone’s second favorite Crazy Eyes, Ramotional Singer, from her Countess Collection* has been such a dramatic story line, that I thought we needed to take a second look.
Real Hockwives 