fabulicious? um?

Former inmate Teresa Giudice can’t write for shit (see: Turning the Tables) but she actually can cook (see: Skinny Italian)!  Well, I wanted to see if that first time was just a fluke, like no one realizing what an insane monster person Jacqueline Laurita was for seven seasons of The Real Housewives of Ney Jersey.  MAN.  What happened there?

dude, you’re in a robe. relax! image source: giphy.com

Unlike yet another memoir from a real housewife, I don’t usually dread making recipes from these ladies as they tend to know how to cook (i.e. have a great co-author and recipe developer).  Since Tre’s whole deal is basically that she is a semi-literate Italian who can cook better than spell, I do tend to trust in this ability of hers.  Watch five second of Joe Giudice on RHONJ.  Now you know that is a man who has never, and will never, not expect there to be a hot meal on the table when he gets home from prison, er, work.

come home soon, joe! only 45 months or so left! image source: giphy.com

Again, the recipes in Fabulicious (UGH) sound great and simple, and are made with real ingrediences.  I was worried it would just be slightly different takes on the classic Italian dishes in Skinny Italian, but nope, a whole new set.  Just like Tre’s new bubbies she got back before all of the, ya know, federal charges.  The theme of this cookbook is all about Teresa turning 40 but still being FABULOUS with a capital, leopard-printed F.  Teresa said you should eat the way she dresses: tacky and bedazzled af.  Just kidding!  She meant full of color from fruits and veggies.

what is the culinary equivalent of this little number? image source: giphy.com

To celebrate Teresa’s way of adorning herself, I decided to make Zuppa di Verdure, a simple soup that features just broth, vegetables and fresh thyme.

da ingrediences!

Besides a lot of chopping, the prep for this soup was pretty easy.  I will say that I thought the sizes were quite large for bite size (that’s what she said?) as the recipe dictated that you slice the zucchini lengthwise and then cut into half moons.  But let go and let Tre, so I trusted her instincts.

clearly she has made good decisions in her life! image source: giphy.com

After prepping all the veg, I got to work on the soup.  Basically, you just throw all of the shit in the pot and let it simmah.

if a hot pink rhinestone cowboy hat were a soup!

After about an hour (Teresa said you could give it only 30 minutes if you were pressed for time, but I figured what the hell), the soup was smelling amazing and ready to eat.  It was a really easy way to get a ton of vegetables in for not a ton of calories.  FABULICIOUS!

sorry for the weird light, it’s like Jesus is blessing this dish.

The soup was decent, but nothing that exciting.  However, my husband had some a few days later and said it was amazing.  When I tried it then, it was so much better! The flavor definitely intensified and was heartier and more filling.  If you have a friend or co-worker or family member who is Bravo-obsessed and likes to cook, I would legit recommend getting them this cookbook for Christmas.  There’s something I never thought I would say about something Teresa Giudice put her name on!  It really is the season of giving.

don’t get too cocky, missy. I am sure you will come out with something super shitty very soon! image source: giphy.com