Fabulicious! Fast & Fit: Italian Flank Steak

missed Fabulicious Part One? check it out!

tre-slow

um… define opposite. image source: giphy.com

After I made Zuppa di Verdure, I wanted to make a heartier dish for my next foray into the gilded land of Giudice deliciousness.  Luckily, there really are a lot of options in Fabulicious (god, if I never have to type that word out again, I would be a very happy girl) that aren’t just pasta.  Honestly, I barely looked at any of the descriptions and went mostly by the photos.  Like any good real housewife, I simply did not (could not) read and based my judgements on purely superficial photos.  I’m learning!

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me right now while you are reading this. image source: bravotv.com

After looking through the pages of, erm, this cookbook, I decided to make Italian Flank Steak with Smothered Onions.  It sounded fucking amazing and, like its author, looked pretty simple.  UNFORTUNATELY, I was not home early the night we were to have this dish, so my poor sweet husband took over for me and made the whole thing.  He has eaten more than his fair share of real housewives and other nonsense people’s food, but he was quite genial about it and even took some photos.

steak-and-onions-knife

that meat is so juicy they should call it joe! oh god, i’m sorry. I must just miss him.

This prep involved chopping up a SHITLOAD of onions (like eight), so I was glad to not be at the helm.  However, that was basically the only prep work and all he had to do was season the flank steak and sear it; cook down the onions before putting the whole mess into the oven.  Teresa’s mom makes the whole thing in the oven, but like Kris Jenner and Kathy Hilton before her, I don’t trust any woman that ends up with ALL of her children on a reality tv show.

kris jenner laughing.gif

mom…ager of the year. image source: eonline.com (of course, fucking seacrest)

I am pretty sure my husband would refuse to make anything by a Kardashian.

Anyway!  Mid-way through the cooking process, things were looking (and smelling goooood).  Once we finally pulled it out to rest, I was dying from hunger and it looked fantastic.

steak-and-onions

when you look at that, you can almost forget all of the screaming of the crazy women around you, right, Andy Cohen?

Tell me you don’t want to dive right into that pile.  Our flank steak was a little bit smaller than what the recipe called for, and I forgot to mention that, so it was slightly overcooked, but not to worry.

final-steak

way better than prison food. except that scene in Goodfellas.

As you can see, this shit was delicious and I would make it again in a New Jersey minute.  HOWEVER, Teresa also claims that it was six servings.  Now, I know our steak was a little bit smaller, but hot damn, those onions cook down and it was NOT that much as a final dish!  Maybe we are just fat af, but we easily finished the whole damn steak and two thirds of the onions between the two of us.  So I guess this is just shady math, like when Coca-Cola pretends that a 20 ounce of soda is 2.5 servings so the sugar content doesn’t look at bad.  Or maybe Teresa doesn’t get much food (as Juicy Joe has got to keep those muscles up) so that what she thinks is normal.  I don’t know, I also don’t have four kids and a bazillion dollar debt to the government, so maybe we just have different perspectives on things.  Happy holidays, yous sons of bitches!

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is this thing on? image source: giphy.com

 

 

 

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